in which my parents learn to use FaceTime (the first in an occasional series)
The following things actually happened during an hour-long conversation between me, the top third of the refrigerator and the bottom half of the liquor cabinet, a blinding set of pot lights, the right side of my mom's face, and my father's left ear. And, occasionally, when he coughed, his left elbow.
My mother rotated the entire computer rather than reverse the camera.
A partial flower arrangement floated into view from the right side of the screen. (The gladiolas were lovely.)
Mom tilted the screen so that I could see Dog 2.0, who immediately began humping a cushion.
Upon being corrected for this behaviour, Dog 2.0 swiftly changed gears and opted instead for a vigorous grooming of his "personal area."
Upon being corrected for that behaviour, Dog 2.0 jumped up onto the bench in front of the picture window and resumed his business, essentially turning my parents' driveway into a doggie peep show.
Upon being corrected for having shown me that, Mom adjusted the screen and resumed our conversation.
Dad's major contribution ended with the words, "and those are TWO places you don't want urine!"
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